Fishing for a laugh
- Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
- Why do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales!
- What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam!
- How do fish go into business? They start on a small scale!
- Why don’t fish ever get caught lying? Because they always scale the truth!
- What’s a fish’s favorite genre of music? Something catchy!
- How does a fisherman measure success? By the size of his fish tale!
- Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools!
- What’s the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? One’s a bottom-dwelling scum-sucker, and the other’s a fish!
- How many fishermen does it take to change a light bulb? None. They love sitting in the dark!
- What do you call a fish that practices medicine? A sturgeon!
- Why did the fish refuse to play piano? Because you can’t tuna fish!
- What’s a fish’s favorite superhero? Aquaman!
- Why do fish never get invited to music concerts? Because you can’t tuna fish, but you can tuna piano!
- How do fish communicate underwater? With a shell phone!
- What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A kingfish!
- Why did the fish go to Hollywood? It wanted to be a starfish!
- What’s a fish’s favorite candy? Swedish Fish!
- Why are fish so well-educated? Because they’re always in schools!
- What did the fish say to the therapist? I’ve got too many issues to deal with!
- Why did the fisherman bring a ladder? Because he wanted to catch a high tide!
- How do you make a fish laugh? Tell a whale of a joke!
- Why did the fish get bad grades in school? Because it was always below “sea” level!
- What did the fisherman say to the magician? Pick a cod, any cod!
- What’s a fish’s favorite television show? Anything on the “net”work!
- How do you organize a fantastic space party? You planet!
- Why are fish so good at basketball? Because they’re great at dribbling!
- What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A ruler of the sea!
- How does a fish stay up to date on current events? It reads the newspaper!
- Why did the fish bring a suitcase to the ocean? Because it wanted to have a whale of a time!
- What do you call a fish with a tie? Well-dressed!
- Why did the fish blush during the school play? It saw the ocean’s bottom!
- What’s a fish’s favorite game to play? Go fish!
- How do fish stay in touch with each other? They drop each other a line!
- Why don’t fish play piano in the wild? You can’t tuna fish!
- What’s a fish’s favorite type of music? Something with a good bass line!
- How do fish end arguments? They agree to disagree!
- What did the fish say to the underwater detective? “Something smells fishy!”
- Why did the fish go to therapy? It had too many emotional scales!
- What’s a fish’s favorite karate move? The salmon chop!
- How does a fish take a picture? With its angelfish!
- What do you call a fish with a crown made of shells? Shellfish royalty!
- How do fish keep their money safe? In the river bank!
- What’s a fish’s favorite movie genre? Anything with a good fin-ish!
- Why are fish so skilled at playing cards? They’re great at dealing!
- What do you call a fish magician? A hocus-pocus-pocus!
- How do fish go on dates? They Netflix and gill!
- Why did the fish get kicked out of school? It was caught with seaweed!
- What’s a fish’s favorite place to shop? The mall!
